Model Advice: 21 Ways To Snag a Model

Models have a reputation of being those unattainable lithe creatures with perfect skin that exist only on pages of glossy magazines and in swanky nightclubs. In reality, models are everywhere. They are also a lot easier to get to know than what you think. The most important thing to remember if you’d like to have a model in your life (and who wouldn’t – she can pose in lingerie) is to forget that she is a model. Treat her like a human being and try to pretend like you care what’s on her gorgeous mind.

Here are some rules to get you started:

1. Know where to hunt. If you usually go to sports bars, you chances of meeting that blonde from Guess ad are smaller than if you hang out at places like model agencies, posh restaurants, night clubs and photo studios. Do your research – read a gossip section of as newspaper to find out where the models are and go right there.

2. It helps to get the right job. Face it: photographers, producers, casting directors or cousins of any of the above have a higher chance of getting a quality lay. It helps to have a professionally done business card, too. You can use something mysterious, such as “entertainment professional” or “Vogue casting director” as a job description.

3. Don’t belittle modeling. Contrary to the popular belief, modeling is a hard work. It’s not just laying on the Bahamas beach while someone presses the camera button. There is a good amount of traveling, butt-kissing and money spending that these girls have to do before they get to where they are. Also, don’t forget that they have to wake up at 4am to be on time for that sunrise photoshoot on the Bahamas.

4. Pretend that you are not interested in sleeping with her, and she’ll rip your clothes off very quickly. Since 99.9 % of men are dying to sleep with her, it makes you very interesting, original and unapproachable. Most of us want what we can’t have.

5. Always pay for her. She’s used to it. Be prepared to spend a lot of money without getting a “thank you” or a kiss. As I said, she is used to it. If you don’t do it, some sleaze ball surely will. Treat her like royalty that she is. Don’t you like that look of jealousy on the face of the guy who’s sitting on your right? Being seen with a beautiful woman can be a very sexy feeling.

6. Some models tend to go for spiritual sensitive types with creative professions. Translation: if you’re broke you can still sleep with a supermodel. Write some poetry, boy!

7. If she takes you to a casting call, where hundreds of gorgeous hopefuls in miniskirts compete for modeling jobs, don’t drool and don’t act like you’re in heaven. Put an emotion of extreme disgust on your face while you are checking out those legs and breasts, then turn back to your model girlfriend and whisper, “ Those girls are nothing in comparison to You. They’re all ugly.” If you see a particularly delicious-looking butt, stare at it and tell your girlfriend to check out how fat it is. This way you get a chance to look at whatever you like, undisturbed.

8. Be attentive and always buy her gifts. The more they cost, the better. Once again, she is used to it. Alternatively, write a lot of poetry.

9. Listen. This one is probably the most important – don’t look at her breasts the whole time. Listen.

10. Complement each one of her features separately. Instead of saying “You are so beautiful,” say “You have the most beautiful eyes (lips, skin, freckles) I’ve ever seen.”

11. Don’t ask her to introduce you to her “model girlfriends.” All men do and she hates it.

12. Tell her that her personality and her brains are what really sets her apart from other women. Her beauty is just an added bonus, not the main thing that attracts you to her. Yeah, right! Are those long lean legs considered a personality trait?


13. Don’t comment on her height. She is a model because she is tall. You are an engineer, because you went to college. Get it? Also, if she likes to wear those slinky lack stilettos that make her exactly six feet three inches tall, don’t be insecure – chances are her agent told her to wear them and she’s just being obedient. What a good girl!

14. Don’t ask her to show you her modeling portfolio; wait until she volunteers to do it. A confident man is never overeager. Move slowly, like a tiger. When you do see the photos, don’t salivate over them. Don’t point at her highly airbrushed photo in a pink bikini and ask, “ Why don’t you look like that in real life, baby?” Models look a lot better on photos that they do in day-to-day situations, and Cindy Crawford made some money off of this sad fact. The supermodel released a book, where she openly explained what products she uses to make her face look like what we know and not what she wakes up with. Sorry to kill your illusions, but models are only mortals.

15. When you look at her portfolio, quickly flip over her sexy photos and stop at the ones where she looks natural. Tell her you like her natural look the best. Most models are insecure, because their job depends on whether or not they got a pimple on the left side of the forehead. She’d appreciate the fact that you find her sexy in jeans.

16. If you get a chance to see her walk the fashion catwalk, always mention that you were mesmerized by her beauty and her graceful walk. Then add that you like the way she walks from the kitchen to your bedroom even more. She’ll walk that way pretty soon.

17. Don’t show her off to your buddies. Chances are, many men have done that to her in the past, and this is why they are now history. Nobody likes to be treated as a beautiful “thing” and models are not an exception. If you are really dying to show her off, though, don’t tell your buddies that she is a model and make sure they don’t ask her any “modeling” questions, unless she is the one initiating the discussion.

18. Read People magazine before your date with her. Models are usually very well educated in the field of entertainment and celebrity-gossip. You are not likely to be as successful if you study the New Yorker before your romantic get together with your Gucci girl, although there are always exceptions.

19. She is on a diet. Accept it and don’t encourage her to eat, because her agent is telling her not to eat. Models have to be thin. Acknowledge it or move on.

20. Don’t tell her that you know a lot of models and that they are all your friends. It sounds like a cheesy bull. Unfortunately, a lot of great guys still use this line, crossing out their chances of hooking up with a model.

21. Tell her that you would like her even if she was ugly and 50 lbs heavier. It would give her the security of knowing that you are not in there just for her beauty. Don’t forget: with that evil modeling agent by her side, she is very unlikely to balloon, so speak freely.